The ChatGPT 7-Day Cruise Ship Diet Challenge
The ChatGPT 7-Day Cruise Ship Diet Challenge
Why I’m Going Carnivore Before Shooting My Comedy Special
In a few weeks, I’ll be shooting my Open Bar Comedy Special — and that means two things:
I need to be sharp on stage. (Pray for me.)
I don’t want to feel like I’m performing in a food coma.
Here’s the wrinkle:
I’m on a 7-day cruise the week before the taping.
Cruises are amazing… but let’s be honest — they are floating, all-you-can-eat temptations. Buffets. Desserts. Late-night pizza. If there’s a place where “I’ll start Monday” goes to die, it’s a cruise ship.
So instead of winging it — or pretending I have willpower at a soft-serve machine — I decided to try something different.
The ChatGPT 7-Day Cruise Ship Carnivore Challenge
The goal is simple:
Eat meat-first
Go low-carb, no sugar
Stay disciplined without being miserable
Step off the ship feeling better than when I stepped on
Not “vacation perfect.”
Just intentional.
Why Carnivore on a Cruise?
Carnivore is about as simple as it gets:
Steak
Eggs
Chicken
Fish
Bacon
Butter
Water & coffee
No calorie counting.
No complicated rules.
No pretending bread doesn’t exist.
Ironically, cruises make this easier than real life. Every meal has protein. The main dining room will happily bring extra steak. Breakfast is eggs and bacon everywhere. You just have to say “no thanks” to the other 90% of the ship.
My Motivation: One Week Out From a Comedy Special
I’m not doing this to become a fitness influencer or to impress anyone at the pool.
I’m doing it because:
I want steady energy on stage
I want to drop inflammation and bloat
I want my clothes to fit better on camera
I don’t want to spend the week before filming trying to undo vacation damage
At 6’6”, weight fluctuations show up fast — especially around the waist. This is about tightening things up, not starving myself.
If I can walk off a cruise:
Down a few pounds
Down an inch or two in the waist
Clear-headed and focused
That’s a massive win.
What I Expect (Realistically)
I’m not expecting miracles.
Based on the plan:
5–9 pounds down (mostly water, some fat)
1–2 inches off the waist
Less bloat
Better sleep
No sugar-crash energy swings
And if the scale lies because cruises are salty, floating hotels?
Fine. I’ll trust the mirror and my belt.
The Bigger Point
This isn’t about being perfect.
It’s about not letting a great opportunity get sabotaged by a great buffet.
Comedy is physical. Timing, breath, presence — all of it is easier when you feel good in your body. This challenge is just one more tool to show up ready when the lights come on.
I’ll report back after the cruise and let you know how it went — honestly.
If it works, great.
If it doesn’t, at least I didn’t pretend cheesecake was a “reward.”
Either way, the Comedy Special is happening — and I plan on being ready.
